Why Investing in Managers is an Active Equality Effort

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In my recent research, I found that women were conclusively more affected than men during COVID-19, a predicament that continues to prevail and evolve, but a close second on the scale of most affected were parents (male and female) as a consequence of managerial frameworks or lack thereof.

Managers and broader corporations as a whole who refused to recognize the complexities of COVID-19, and the associated detrimental factors, compounded the problems for parents specifically. In many cases, organizations made it so difficult for employees to co-exist in their new reality of balancing the care for children with careers, that one parent was forced out of their jobs: mothers. This should not come as a shock based on the knowledge that over two million women are or have considered taking a leave of absence or leaving the workforce entirely due to the COVID-19 crisis, but it should be shocking.

The reason for this forced departure is “simply” based on the fact that what we think about care and who is responsible for it is faulty. This is where the concept of Default to Responsibility comes in and is a newfound necessity for organizations to understand. 

While the research shows that some corporations directed their managers to be flexible, they did not define what flexibility was or how to achieve it. Further, it was found in a Riveter study that only six percent recorded their employer changing benefits to help parents during the pandemic. Six percent! An absence of empathy paired with clear expectations for managers to follow created a climate filled with tension, mistrust, and lower productivity. Innovation flattened, stress increased, and now corporations face the costly reality of replacing the women they lost. For each woman who departed, organizations can expect to pay six to nine months of the individual’s salary to replace her. 

Managers must receive adequate education and preparation for how to be steadfast amidst uncertain environments. Inclusive climates require effort, knowledge, observation, and consistent discourse. Without the constant efforts of improving climate -- a very feasible and reasonable process for managers to achieve -- it will unravel at the seams as pressures supersede values. An unsustainable approach and one that ensures inequality.

THOUGHT STARTERS:

If you are a manager --
Consider value-based leading. What is one of your core values? Why is it relevant to your leadership?

If you are a governor of a corporation -- 
What resources are you giving to your managers to create inclusive climates that spark higher engagement, minimal turnover, and superior problem-solving?

First posted on LinkedIn.

Take a Breath and Listen

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When I commence work with a client, I notice in our preliminary discussion whether or not someone is well adept at active listening or if it's going to be a focal point for our work together. The importance of active listening cannot be overstated. It establishes trust, offers validation, and is even a brain exercise from which we benefit. Then why do so few people listen well?

The two forms of listening are discriminative and comprehensive. Discriminative is developed at an early age and is the most basic form of listening. It does not require the understanding of words, but focuses on sound and allows us to distinguish the subtleties of people who are happy or sad, angry or stressed. It's the superpower of "how someone is saying something." Meanwhile, comprehensive listening involves understanding messages that are being communicated. Like discriminative listening, comprehensive listening is fundamental to all listening sub-types. The listener first needs appropriate vocabulary and language skills to comprehend messages.

There are other forms of listening too - Critical, Therapeutic, and Appreciative. But we often are too busy listening to our own thoughts or are waiting to say our piece. We're not very good at active listening; in fact, we're downright bad at it. Listening actively is an analytical exercise. It requires concentration on *all* of what is said. Not only the words, but the tone being used and the body language choices. Your opportunity is to process that information as it's received, forming conclusions along the way (and not before someone is done speaking).

But instead, we're conditioned to think it's acceptable to look at the text message we just received, open an email from your archnemesis, swipe left (or is it right?) on Tinder, and attend to WhatsApp messages, Slack pings, or even contemplate dinner options... None of that is OK if you want to show others you care not only about them but about what they are saying.

The good news? Listening is a skill that can be learned and there are techniques you can use to improve your listening effectiveness. First, set expectations. In meetings, it's best to let your team know what is expected of them. Do you allow the team to be disengaged, looking at their phones, or do you expect them to participate fully, and be attentive to what's in front of them? Contrary to common belief, multitasking isn't all that it's chalked up to be (it takes a serious toll on productivity!). In my household, I simply will stop speaking until my husband is off his cellphone and I know he is able to listen to what it is I am saying.

Some tips for helping you become a better listener:

• Identify Your Own Biases: Does the sound of someone's voice annoy you? Get past it and listen.

• Keep an Open Mind: Do not jump to snap judgments. Ratiocinate and flex your critical thinking capabilities.

• Mirror Back: Paraphrase what someone said to help your attention stay on that person and also to confirm you are understanding the intended message.

• Overcoming External Distractions: Set those expectations and resist the urge to pick up your cellphone or respond to emails while in the process of listening. [Short on time? No problem, but communicate that at the forefront. Expectations are your friend.]

Bonne chance!

First published on LinkedIn

Industry Highlight: Design, Engineering, and Construction

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We buy boys construction toys, and we buy girls babies and homemaker sets. The conditioning begins when we take the first swallow of earthly oxygen. Just take a peek at Gabrielle Galimberti’s Toy Stories exhibit if you think my statement is too bold - the global norm is far from teaching children gender neutrality. But what happens when women, or men, step outside the predetermined gender boxes (and all of the behaviors that come along with them)? How does this affect our professional and personal lives? 

After earning my undergraduate degree I worked for a small private university that specializes in architecture and architectural design. I worked in the office of admissions where I got to manage and work with students. Lucky for me, these students became architects, designers, and engineers - and I’m still in contact with a number of them. Recently, Tara Spencer and I were catching up and in a natural course, we ended up discussing the immense gender divide in the construction industry as a whole. I reflected upon a short stint of mine when I worked at a construction company. I definitively coined the culture as antediluvian and underdeveloped. I lasted at that place of employment for six months. 

The feelings came fluttering back. And my experience was not an isolated one. In fact, it was cushy. Tara, a licensed architect, and certified interior designer embarked on a data-collecting journey to capture other women’s experiences in an industry dominated by men and so clearly overshadowed by a boys club set of rules. 

Tara polled interior designers, architects, construction managers, engineers, interior designers, and product designers. As I read through the personal accounts of these female professionals being on the receiving end of microaggressions and clear dismissiveness, I had to pick my jaw up off the floor.

I am giving you this detail to set the stage for a series. We want to share real examples of what women have experienced in the construction industry, and offer ways you can maintain your confidence - you are credentialed after all - but also combat against the, at times, vulgarities. It’s a challenging feat; anyone who has been on the receiving end of lewd remarks can relate… There’s not an easy answer. At least not one that feels safe or necessarily appropriate.  

If you struggle with a male-dominated place of work, where your intelligence is overlooked and misconduct is rampant, tune in to this series. We aim to have you walk away with an understanding of what challenges women face in these fields, but also to provide proven tactics for managing provocation and realizing that you are not the problem. You are not alone and there is strength in numbers. Mainly, though, there is strength in knowledge. We can educate women to respond strongly and we can educate men that behavior matters -- as does allyship. 

First published on LinkedIn.

Cultivate a Leadership Culture

Mimicry. We see this both in nature and in the workplace. Whether it's the viceroy butterfly attempting to look like its more attractive counterpart, the monarch (I’m partial), or if it’s the malleable mind of an employee who mimics a leader’s behaviors, we must create organizational frameworks that encourage an environment that fosters leadership. 

What steps can organizations take to mold future leaders and help individuals reach their full potential? 

Mentorship. 

Formalized mentor programs are implemented to help people evolve. Whether a person is a new or tenured employee, the act of mentorship is invaluable. Mentors can shed light into life experiences: missed opportunities, successes, behavioral shortcomings, moments of strength… The list goes on. Organizations have an opportunity to help employees advance in more ways than one when a flexible but scalable mentor program is put into place.

[But here’s the thing -- if there isn’t a mentor program, that should not stop you from seeking out a mentor. Notably to my female audience, do not be afraid to ask for time from someone you respect. Observe the people you want to mirror and ask yourself why. Request time with this person.] 

Acknowledgment. 

I mention acknowledgment more than I do not. Why? It’s a powerful way to establish relational trust and respect. Furthermore, it increases discretionary effort (who doesn’t want to work harder for someone they respect and appreciate?). If you find yourself in a work environment without acknowledgment, the organization is missing the mark. Herein lies an opportunity: It can start with you. Acknowledge your colleagues, your direct reports, and even your boss. A contagion of acknowledgment can change workplace cultures into supportive, accountable ones.  

Consistency. 

Can your colleagues count on you? In an organization where leaders are notoriously late for meetings, cut off counterparts to take calls, and interrupt repeatedly to hear their own voice, there is little hope for the next class. Consistency is a double-edged sword. Do you want to be consistent? Craft what you want it to mean for yourself. To me, being consistent means many things. That I deliver work in a timely way, done with thought, effort, and a scrutinizing eye. But it also means being a confidant, and a voice of reason. It means providing emotional regularity, and being truthful about distractions. The truth is, consistency simply defines a repeatable pattern. This is why it is essential to craft what consistency means within your organization. Consistent leaders can encourage collaboration, trust, and accountability. 

We absorb tendencies from people we are around the most. And there’s no spoiler here, we spend a lot of time at work - at least 10 continuous years of our life. Great place to pick up habits, but it’s an even better place to practice habits, and teach others those habits. 

Foster leadership by being a mentor, by acknowledging others, and by consistently leading by example. If you want your organizations to foster an environment of leadership, it starts with you. 

First published on LinkedIn.