Are We Back to "Normal" Yet?

Photo by Andrew Thornebrooke on Unsplash

No, We Are Not Quite Yet Back to “Normal.” 

It’s been a while since I’ve written an article and posted on my blog. In part because of life responsibilities, in part because of my own conation, and in part because of exciting work commitments. But, it has been too long and thus I will be back on a quarterly basis to share my two cents about how we can observe current events or life circumstances and extract a valuable leadership and/or management lesson. 

Back to the topic at hand. We are *all* excited to get back to “normal.” What normal means differs from person to person, though, and upon reflection, my perception of normal may have evolved over the past two years. I think we can all agree that normalcy includes a decreased need for masking and an increase in social activities. Normal might even mean some time in an office space, on mass transit, less shopping online, and dining out. 

And while we dabble in the removal of social distancing and masking and aim to enjoy our lives again, we are met with an onslaught of disengagement, burnout, disregard (for fellow humans), and dwindling customer service. I know that if I easily know five people who are experiencing or who have experienced these feelings/encounters, I have no doubt that you have a list handy, too. In fact, you might be experiencing feelings of shoddy customer service or utter fatigue and burnout *right now.* What’s my point? Well, the pandemic may be ending, and things may be returning to normal, but there are lasting effects that we must become aware of and work to improve – NOW. 

Notably, the APA is incredibly concerned for the mental health of our youth – so much so that it has defined the deterioration of mental health in children as a crisis. And, as already alluded to adults aren’t all that with it either. From (the many) altercations on airlines to the hissy fits I see almost daily on the street, I fear we have forgotten how to co-exist. Turns out, there’s some truth to this assertion. 

The number one reason for people behaving in rude or uncivil ways is stress. And we all have undoubtedly experienced at least some stress throughout this pandemic. I need not go into the laundry list of just why people may have experienced stress of late, but it is worth reflecting upon how you, as an individual, feel you deal with stress. Are you more reactive? Less compassionate? Impatient? Quick to madden? Is it any wonder that conflict is stirring around us? I think not. 

What’s more, rudeness (a derivative of poor emotional regulation, caused by frequent and compounded stress), can be contagious. Say you get a delivery that was tossed around in the truck that it came to you on, and then it is used as a soccer ball in the street (you imagine). You now need to not only submit a claim with the company from which you purchased the item and hope for a replacement, but you must determine how to return the product in its botched packaging. Then, moments later, you are taking a call with a colleague who made a mistake on a project and you are noticeably short with them, striking an attack on their competency. You have passed on the angst you’ve just endured. According to Porath, people are three times less likely to help someone else if they feel they have been treated poorly. This means that we might go out of our way to be unkind, rather than kind, and that will consequently motivate the next person to pass on the snub. 

In the context of the work environment – whether onsite or at home – our actions definitionally affect others. This means that as a manager or as a colleague, we must be aware that our resiliency against rudeness has waned; we are at risk of infection! There is little chance for constructive feedback or conflict resolution in this state if we let the rude contagion win. The saying “kindness, pass it on” might need to be our new mantra, especially as we aim to get back to “normal.” A profound finding? Perhaps not, but I am taking note that in the days ahead I will put kindness at the forefront of my actions and communication. Try it with me. 

Until next time,

Brielle

First published on LinkedIn

Retain Your Employees with Just Two Efforts

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The Great Resignation was initially spoken about as women departed their places of work in 2020 (either by force or by “choice”). Over five million women were affected. In the present day, nearly two million women still have not returned to the workforce (in the United States alone). 

Interestingly, this “Great Resignation” has taken shape to classify the departure of both women and men, noting the changing landscape of work, and employees’ sentiments on what work should look like. While I do not argue there are clear trends of disengagement which have led to both men and women leaving the workforce, there is still a monumental issue of women being at the helm of COVID job losses. 

Media outlets, particularly those who cover leadership and management, have used this opportunity to talk about the importance of retention. I find it startling, and fascinating, that due to the fact this Resignation now includes men, it is being discussed further. Not just the reality of departures, but the essentiality that companies do all they can do to make people stay. Where was this same tone during the pandemic when women were mass exiting? 

Needless to say, the point remains that in order for the economy to stabilize and for companies to flourish, both men and women must remain, or return, to the workplace. But how are we intending to help people return? How are we intending to keep people content in their current positions? 

If you are familiar with my work you know I advocate for women. And, after a year researching and publishing a book on women’s experiences during COVID-19, I assure you it is women that companies need to be focused on when it comes to retention and engagement. Regardless, engagement drives performance and the best companies are composed of diverse teams, thus there are actions you can take readily to engage all company members. 

Career Transparency

Career transparency can minimize ambiguity and increase engagement. Helping employees know what’s next for them (and helping him/her create the path) is paramount. What makes this employee tick? What areas do they excel in? How does their current career path allow for their skills to shine? 

If you haven’t discussed this with your team members, it’s time. If your team member isn’t sure what it is they want in their career, your job is to help them discover. But, odds are, they have an inkling of what they want to accomplish, and have been waiting for you to ask how they can achieve their goals. 

Recognition 

Yes, something as simple as recognition can increase retention. Have you ever been in a position where a superior took an idea as his own? Or did an exceptional job on a project and was simply assigned the next? This wears on people. Managers must have integrity and shed a light on their team members’ successes, not take them as their own. Further, managers must take the time to privately and publicly recognize their team. Not only does this spark discretionary effort, but a microculture of recognition demonstrates to a company as a whole that behavior that promotes and encourages will also establish trustworthy and hardworking teams. 

What Makes Us Who We Are?

Well, who we are and who we become is comprised of many elements. Our experiences, beliefs, perception of identity, interpersonal relationships, upbringing… All of these facets contribute to the greater construct of our being. 

Often who we are is driven by what we want and what brings meaning, fortune, or happiness to life.  

The COVID-19 pandemic threw a wrench in the process of creating or maintaining our identity. It changed not only how we got our meaning but it changed our motivation too.

I love large public speaking engagements and I enjoy meeting with my clients face-to-face. This all changed with the pandemic. Not only was I unable to engage in intellectually stimulating conversations without getting eye fatigue, but I could not get the same response to presentations that I had grown accustomed to. Rather than gaining motivation from those talks, I was being drained of all my energy. The absence of observed interest and comprehension through body language really made my virtual sessions, talks, and the like a challenge for me. 

We all have a story like this. Our plans were derailed unexpectedly and swiftly. 

Rather than focus on the (many) challenges we’ve observed though -- from illness to layoffs to virtual schooling -- we must try to use this as a learning tool for the future. Part of this learning requires us to become aware of the fact that we can become easily attached to an "ideal state" regardless of whether we are fully in control (think career progression, childcare, etc.).

Could you control a global pandemic? No. Do you have every right to be disappointed about a different reality? Sure. But herein lies an opportunity to capture what it is that we love(d) so dearly about life before COVID-19... For example, Gathering. Presenting. Teaching. Learning. The list goes on. But, more importantly, what motivated you to keep going? What enabled belonging and happiness?  

With the Delta variant alive and well I am re-visiting the hard facts of what is and is not in my control and am seeking solutions to progress with honing my skills regardless of the motivation output vs. input reality. This adaptation and acceptance of doing business differently will, ultimately, provide me with a new skill and will also teach me more about just what it is that makes me tick. In the process, I will learn the power of being in the moment -- ultimately leading to a unique embrace of taking it as it comes in an effort to live a more contented life. 

Identify where your motivation is rooted, and adapt to the circumstance.

First posted on LinkedIn.

Too Busy to Be a Good Manager? Time to Reset.

Photo by Brett Jordan on Unsplash

Feeling mentally and physically drained as a manager of people? You’re not alone. Managers everywhere are grappling to keep up. Flexibility, empathy, consistency, and intentional leading takes energy. Thus, it’s no wonder many managers struggled during the pandemic’s peak which has flowed over into the present day.

How does one know what to say, or what to do when faced with circumstances never seen before? How a manager behaves is a pretty basic leadership style trait: There are people who are relationship-centric, and there are people who are task-centric. Both profiles are easily identifiable among managers – and from your own personal experiences, I’m sure you’re thinking of a manager who tended to lean one way or another. When managers are under stress which is compounded by “the unknowns” it can be easy to resort to what is most comfortable, regardless of what is best for the team. 

If you are a manager reading this, it’s probable you were trying to keep your head above water in the past year and a half. You may have become overly invested in personal experiences that ended up hurting productivity, or you may have compartmentalized other peoples’ issues as a concern that was not your own.  Perhaps now is the ideal moment to reflect upon what could be done better across the spectrum and how you can prepare for crises. Evaluate the current atmosphere and team dynamics to make up for the damage done or for the missed opportunities.

First, slow it down.

I get it, easier said than done. But the nation is catching up to this whole “people matter and we better invest in them” thing, so it is your job to take the steps needed to ensure the vitality and successes of your workgroup.

What helps slow things down, you may ask? Emotional regulation. How are you feeling, why are you feeling that way? Are you quick to react under stress, or do you reflect and respond? Impulsive decision-making – what I like to call “hectic direction” – will only cause uncertainty and concern among team members. Being thoughtful and poised is not to be confused with being slow. Steady yourself with deep breathing, fair turnaround time, and clear expectations about what can and cannot be done within predefined time frames.

Second, reignite feedback.

Whether your corporation provides formal reviews or not, you should be giving your team members regular, quarterly reviews. Work with your team members to set goals, output, timelines, and reasonable expectations about what a person can count on with upward mobility, pay, flexibility, or career pathing. Do you spend time with your team members individually? What are you doing to ensure their psychological safety? Listening is the first step to establishing trust and with trust, candid conversation and better performance will follow.

This is a great summer exercise to employ prior to the frenzy of back to school and the decrease in summer vacationing.